Naked In Manhattan: An NYC Travel Diary

When I went to New York City I got robbed, stuck in an elevator, pushed off the Empire State Building, and hit by a city bike. I thought going to New York would be relaxing and fun, but I literally got pickpocketed twice, and now my AirPods are gone again. I did actually meet Marcello Hernandez, and his mom has a selfie of us three on her phone.

Friday, January 24, 8:09 AM (5:09 AM PST): A Train to Manhattan

When people say the subway is dangerous, they’re not kidding. I hopped off the plane at JFK with a dream and my Arc’teryx. Welcome to the city that never sleeps, am I gonna fit in? I slept for maybe half an hour on the plane, so I couldn’t help myself: I had to sleep on the subway. Big mistake. I was sitting next to the door and I got mugged. I should have listened to the sign right above my head that said: “DO NOT SLEEP ON THE TRAIN”. RIP my phone, wallet, passport, and dignity.

Friday, January 24 In Review

Besides my lack of sleep, today was an excellent start to my stay in New York: I got to see the city and I was ON Broadway. Seeing Wicked on stage was life-changing, and there was most definitely no sobbing during “Defying Gravity.” At the theatre, they had these slushies and the Gilinda one was actually mouth-watering. It was a creamy, fruity, pink concoction that made for an absolutely gravity-defying, tastebud-lifting experience. 

At TSA they threw out half of my makeup, so I went to CVS and I bought everything except for the things I actually needed. I had amazing soup dumplings for lunch, then found out I did stupendously on my chemistry final, which made my lunch taste more exquisite.

I always dreamt of having M&Ms with my face on them, and today I made those dreams into reality.

Saturday, January 25

Saturday, Jan. 25, 2025 is written in my books as one of the best days of my life. To start my day off I absolutely finessed a Dialga in a Pokemon Go raid that I barely did anything in. I was like that group member in a project that did nothing but still got an outstanding mark.

Following my amazing win at breakfast, I skedaddled down 8th Ave to Dunkin’ and got myself the Sabrina Carpenter drink. I had been waiting to taste (no pun intended) the Dunkin’ special ever since I landed, and it was a replica of the Brown Sugar Shaken Espresso from Starbucks. 

After caffeinating myself, I magically teleported to the Museum of Modern Art. There are a lot of interesting works on display at MoMA, there was this one painting that I will never forget: Double Self-Portrait by Richard Estes. It was hidden away by the elevators on the fourth floor, but when I first saw it, I actually thought it was a photo. After pondering art for a bit I made my way down Fifth Ave, munching on an everything bagel with strawberry cream cheese on the way. 

The second half of Saturday was monumental. After wasting time on Fifth Ave in the shops lining the street I made my way to the Belasco Theater. We had an hour to kill before the show started and a French restaurant was beside the theatre. The food wasn’t that good and the server slammed my grandma's wine glass on the table, but every table had crayons to colour on the placemats, so I was happy.

I watched Maybe Happy Ending. I honestly wasn’t excited about watching it, but now have no regrets since it was funny. After the show, I copped some Canes, but was disappointed to find that it is literally nothing special.

One thing I wanted to do was watch Saturday Night Live, but after a failed attempt at obtaining tickets, I was sentenced to standing in the cold at 2:00 AM. Imagine if I met Marcello Hernandez! That would have been crazy! But instead, Domingo was there. Ugh, lame.

Sunday, January 26

After my late night, I needed a little pick-me-up for breakfast and my legs led me to Joe and the Juice. My Serrano on gluten-free bread extra toasted and GO Away Doc lacked the UMPH I needed to wake up, so I spent nine dollars on a singular shot of espresso. I’ve genuinely developed a caffeine problem, because after breakfast I went to Koreatown to reconnect with my roots and I found myself drinking more espresso at the Starbucks reserve in the Empire State Building.

After caffeinating myself even more, my grandmother and I made our descent towards the Flatiron district. I don’t understand why it's called the Flatiron, it barely looks like a flat iron. More like a special triangle with a sin 60º disguised as a building.

I was told by a magical all-knowing New York City Talking Map (Adelaide Guan) to visit Bathhouse Flatiron. We couldn’t get into the bathhouse until 8 PM, so my grandmother and I ventured off. 

All of a sudden I found myself teleported to Cornelia Street, and to my surprise, Taylor Swift was standing right in front of me. I thought she wouldn’t walk Cornelia Street again, but I guess I was wrong. We had a great conversation about her plans for her next album release… I can proudly say Reputation (Taylor’s Version) is out on February 29th, 2025. Taylor bought me my new bathing suit as a hush gift to not leak the release date. She then took me to Chelsea Market where she forced my grandmother to buy a $12 yogurt parfait that was never finished.

When we eventually arrived at the bathhouse, words can actually not describe the extraterrestrial experience. There were so many attractive, aura-farming individuals lounging around the pools. Ten out of ten experience. Thank you magical all-knowing New York City Talking Map (Adelaide Guan) for the suggestion.

On this day, I realized that my hotel was right beside the church of Scientology.

Monday, January 27, 4:12 PM, 40.774727, -73.980979

This guy was crashing out and instigating while I was waiting in line at the post office. He was mad because the package delivery person didn’t drop off his package. He was trying to pick up his package even though the person who tried to deliver it was still delivering other ones, and he did not understand that. These other people were trying to get their passports and they were freaking out because the passport person had just clocked out, but they really really needed their passports. I wonder why. While I was walking back to Central Park, I witnessed a fight happen on the other side of the street.

My Review of the Levian Bakery Gluten Free & Vegan Walnut and Chocolate Chip Cookie

This cookie was the best vegan cookie I have ever had. It was soft and crumbly and wasn’t raw but moist and underbaked in the most amazing way possible. My expectations were lower than UofT’s acceptance rate with it being a vegan cookie because ew. But the mound of dough was crispy on the outside and soft on the inside. It was wonderful. 

Monday, January 27

My last full day in New York City was very stereotypical for a trip to the Big Apple. I had made a reservation for Tea at the Plaza Hotel and my grandma wanted to go to the Empire State Building. While we were going up to the observation deck, the elevator broke and stranded us for 30 minutes. When we finally got to the observation deck, this rude lady shoved me, and my AirPods fell to the bottom of the Empire State. Then a taxi ran them over. Distraught by the tragic event, we evacuated by helicopter. The helicopter ride was beautiful; we flew over Manhattan and the Hudson River before landing on top of the Plaza Hotel. They had a gluten-free menu just for me. It was the best high tea I have ever had. 

After our afternoon tea, we went on a walk to meet Bob Dylan before our dinner reservation. Bob and I walked around Central Park talking about how much the biopic of his career helped grow his audience years later. After saying our goodbyes to Bob, I went to get stamps for my postcards and cookies at Levain Bakery. The cookies were so good, but my dinner was way better. A friend suggested this, I am so glad we went because it was the best pasta I have ever had in my life.